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[It's in the evening that there's a steady knocking on Kano's door from Yuya and he waits with a weary expression. The guards get a greeting this time, assurance he wants to talk and he hopes Kano will open up and he won't face to ask them to unlock the door for him.]

[ It takes a minute or two, but then a piece of paper slides under the door along with a black sharpie. On the paper reads: ]

What's up?

[ in Kano's handwriting. There is no "who tf is this?" because he honestly only has all of two people who he believes would bother coming to see him, and he can judge by their handwriting who it is. ]

[Yuya stares at the paper for a moment, his hands curling into fists. It takes all his willpower not to slam the door.

The paper slides back a minute later.]

let me in

No.

[ The response slides out from under the door quicker this time, in red ballpoint pen. Yuya can keep the sharpie so they don't have to keep passing that back and forth. ]

[Oh. Yuya drops the sharpie and this time does smack his fist against the door.]

You don't get to do what you did and then hide from it, Kano! Let me in!

[He's not above forcing his way, angry, betrayed feelings still bubbling under the surface.]

[ Yeah, if Yuya's going to act like that, Kano's absolutely not going to let him in, muffled thumps on the other side of the door that are probably footsteps on hardwood floor— away from the door and not towards it. ]

Later. Come back tomorrow.

[ With no promise he'll be let in. ]

No. [He sinks against the door, taking deep breaths.]

I know it was you, Kano. You lied. Nana died. I died! So did other people--and I want an explanation.

[ He bites at his bottom lip, pacing the room instead of getting the door. The window is looking very tempting at the moment, but that escape route doesn't work anymore thanks to the floating spell.

How is he supposed to explain? There was a reason, but... He can't say it. He won't. ]

I fucked up, alright? I know I did. But what good's an explanation? I don't need you to forgive me.

You don't need me too? [Yuya's voice goes shrill, his whole body trembling. What... what kind of response is that?

Frustrated, grief-stricken tears well up in his eyes and clog up his throat, a half of a sob rolling out.] It's good because I want it! Because you're my friend and I trusted you and I want to know why! I know it wasn't just because, Kano, you summoned a demon in the middle of the damn school!

[ God. He can hear the tears in Yuya's voice, even if he can't see them, and it just makes him clamp down on his lip even harder, until he tastes the salt of blood and eases up a little. He tries to laugh, but it's a quiet, incredulous and wavering sound, soft and unsure if it's even heard over Yuya's yelling. ]

Sorry, but I failed, so you don't get to know why. It's better if you don't, Yuya. It's better if you don't... [ "be my friend," but after losing Toki, the pain of that still raw and deep, he can't bring himself to say it. ] If you don't trust me anymore.

[Yuya smacks his fist against the door again.]

Jerk! You were there, I know--you know what that place was like! It hurt. It hurts. Do you even care?! Did you ever care--about me? What about Nana?!

[It hurt so much. Why won't Kano just tell him why he hurt him? How can he claim he's always doing things to make amends, and not care about hurting them in the first place?]

[ Of the people Kano had seen in the Daze, Nana wasn't one of them. Yuya wasn't supposed to be one of them. There wasn't supposed to be any murder, Kano wasn't supposed to have been stuck in the Daze, and he really wishes Yuya had taken the hint about the roadtrip and protective gear and all that just the day before, as flippant as the conversation was. ]

Shut up. I care, but who are you to believe me? Why should I waste my time trying to convince you?

I'm the person who died again to get you out of that place after you stayed behind.

[He doesn't need Kano to convince him, because whatever Kano says isn't what matters. He needs to see it. Yuya needs to see him.]

So let me in there and face me. Because that's what I'm asking for instead of walking away. I didn't have to look for you, but I did, so stop shutting me out!

[ For all Kano cares, that's Yuya's problem. Always caring too much about people— about him— always rushing into things to save people, putting his safety and well-being aside for the sake of others, needing to play the hero. That's Yuya's problem, even if it was for Kano's sake.

He's going to get punched. He more than deserves it, but opening the door means opening up— in the sense that something will progress, when he'd just rather just leave it at Yuya hating his guts and walking away from him. Maybe, if he's lucky, Yuya will punch him in the stomach and then walk away, a win-win situation for everybody.

Wordlessly, Kano trudges towards the door and opens it; instead of taking a step back like he would always do, he stays, leaning against the frame. Silent. ]

[Yuya stands there, staring at Kano with hard eyes and streaks of tears down his face. Now that he has to see him, it's taken the words out of his mouth for a moment.

And then he strides forward, at once moving to slam his fist into Kano's stomach and bulldoze his way into Kano's room by force. He knows he's stronger, and he expects that to work in his favor. If he can, he'll squeeze the door shut behind him too.]

[ Ugh—- the punch knocks the wind out of him, Kano doubling over to grab his stomach and curl in on himself so Yuya wouldn't be able to see- fuck, is he coming inside? That's the opposite of what Kano wanted, picking himself back off the ground and trying to get the door open again, Yuya can't hold it closed forever. ]

Hey, hey, hey, get out, get out!! My room's a mess, so you're not invited!!!

[ The room is, of course, as clean and empty as always. Except the bed is made and there is no chair. Nightmare, the bearded dragon, blinks down at the two boys from the top bunks. ]

[Yuya slams his back against the door, using his weight to keep it shut regardless of Kano's protests. He flexes his fingers looking down at his hand as he breathes deeply and doesn't even give Kano a second glance.

He looks up finally, weary-eyed and eyes quickly glancing over Kano's face for signs that his illusion is up and what expression he's making.]

What were you trying to do?

[ His illusion is up, like it always is. Yuya never gets to see the dark circles under his eyes, disheveled hair, cuts and bruises up and down his arms. He looks away from Yuya, eyes on the ground as he takes a step back and shoves his hands into his jacket pockets. ]

...I did exactly what it looks like.

[ Again, not answering Yuya's question. He did what he did; intentions don't matter. ]

Edited 2019-05-26 01:29 (UTC)

What did you want to happen after you summoned that daemon? [He can keep asking, a hundred different ways until he chips away to the answer he wants.

The intention does matter to him.]

[ Yuya will have to keep asking, a hundred different ways because this isn't something Kano wants to admit. Because the intention isn't a wholly good one, it definitely isn't one that Yuya would agree with, and it really doesn't matter.

Enough playing along, he decides. Yuya won't get the truth out of him, so instead, he'll do what he does best: be aggravating and annoying until the other party walks away in frustration. Yuya can hit him as many times as he wants: this is the Kano that Yuya knows better, one who smiles and jokes and dodges around all the important things; why change now? ]

Hm~ Something like... world peace?

How does summoning a demon make world peace? [His tone is as flat as his expression.] Didn't you read enough to know what kind of demon it'd be like?

Hm... Yep! I knew exactly what I was doing. It was for the sake of world peace, but too bad, I failed~

[ Of course he knew what he was doing, researching and studying and seeking out a good place and day to do it. He thought he had prepared for everything. It wasn't supposed to have gone wrong. ]

What part was a failure? [Wrong demon? The death? Not dying properly?]

...Everything? Look at what happened. What part could you say was a success?

[ World peace was not achieved. But still... even at the very very very end, there was a glimmer of hope that something could have gone right. Kano, for all the time he was stuck in the Daze meeting up with people as they found their way out, never did try to escape himself.

If not for Ziggy, and Yuya, and everybody else who'd brought everybody back, Kano would have died in there. And he would have been okay with it. ]

I don't know, as long as you keep hiding what you were thinking. You're not me, so I can't assume you feel the same way about what you did.

[He tilts his head to look at Kano wearily. It feels like it should be obvious why he keeps asking.] Is your way of 'making it up to me' going to be pretending my feelings aren't there? That I'm not hurt?

05/25

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